Anybody have any Crisco?

I want to thank everyone for not thinking I deserted you guys this last week. One of my many responsibilites at work is inventory management. We cycle count all of our inventory every month(that means we have to physically count everything in our warehouse). This normally takes on average 40 to 50 hours a month. At times, it can be quite a heavy load. But I like it because I get to run through all of the numbers(Yoo hoo!) and then if our inventory is over/under I have to investigate why and fix it(Dr. Watson and I!). The one thing about doing this is that it never stops. I am now done for April, but starting Monday, we will heading into May and it all stars over again, hence, the photo(I apologize for the use of "buns"). But I can start fresh and it can really be fun. Also, corporate office in G.R. compares our accuracy percentage to all the other 16 branches and we get rated for how accurate we are. And since I love to crunch numbers, at the end of the month, I already know how everyone else is and I run the different reports up and down to see where we are at. It's surprising how accurate we keep things. Out of $531,570.33 we were only off $1,241.95, which is 99.766%! That puts us in 2nd place. The branch in 1st is 99.98%, which seems to be almost impossible, since our average for the company so 98.61%. We also have to clean up a lot of different things at the end of the month, so it can be pretty busy. I'm glad God made me to be good with numbers and I'm proud of the work I do(ewe). I'm so happy to see that everyone is doing good and I appreciate you all. God Bless.

I bet you forgot about the bizarre phobias, huh?
Alektorophobia - A fear of chickens
Chionophobia - A fear of snow
Linonophobia - A fear of string

Kung Pow !...Chicken?

Listen up young grasshoppers! Do you know Praying Mantis?
I am really in the mood for Chinese food! Wow! Maybe sometime we could all get together and have a nice dinner at a Chinese restaurant. Have you ever used chopsticks? I have only tried using chopsticks once or twice with little success. Did you know that according to the Japanese, there are many rules for the proper use of chopsticks? Improper use includes wandering the chopsticks over several foods without decision, and is called "mayoibashi". Also, the unforgivable act of licking the ends of chopsticks is called "neburibashi". Obviously the lack of chopstick etiquette is strictly taboo. I read something else kinda neato about the traditional bowing of the Japanese. The bowing carries different meanings at different angles. A bow at an angle of five degrees means "Good day" (simple greeting). A bow at an angle of fifteen degrees is also a common salutation, a bit more formal it means "Good morning." A bow at an angle of thirty degrees is a respectful bow to indicate appreciation for a kind gesture. A bow at a forty-five-degree angle is used to convey deep respect or an apology. Pretty cool :)

Check these out:
Japanophobia = A fear of Japanese people or things made from Japan (obviously!)
Sinophobia - A fear of Chinese people or Chinese culture
Papyrophobia - A fear of paper or paper products

Huff & Puff!....

Lately I have been trying to run a mile at night, maybe twice a week-without great success. I want to get back into shape and of course, Anna, has been a good inspiration to me. But, when I run, my mind drifts to lots of different things. The one thought pattern that is constant, is that I like to figure out the percentage of the mile I have ran and how much I still have to go-how my time is and if I'll beat my other times. I know, it's just another wierd quirk! :) And so the "math curse" beckons my mind to investigate why there are 5,280 feet in a mile. I know we get the mile from our Roman ancestors, yet I still wonder, I still need to know why...so....
The measurement known as a mile is a vestige of the Roman Empire's rule over Britain. At this time, the Romans had a measurement known as mille pasuum (ME-lay PA-soo-em), or a thousand paces(can you imagine counting that!). A pace comprised five, possibly sandal shod, Roman feet. Using a simple mathematical calculation, we arrive at 5,000 feet per mile.
The demise of the Roman Empire left the Britons in a quandary. They now had a mile, consisting of 5,000 feet, and their own agricultural measurement, the furlong, used to measure the farmers' fields for the purpose of property deeds, etc. Instead of using the Roman foot in calculating the measure of a furlong, they used the distance a horse could pull a plow, in a linear fashion, before the nag needed a nap. They agreed that this measurement consisted 660 feet.
Now came the dilemma. The British wished to marry the furlong to the mile, but, as they wanted a mile to comprise eight furlongs, totaling 5,280 feet, instead of the Roman 5,000 feet per mile, they had no choice but to select one of the two. Not surprisingly, they chose their measurement over the Roman measurement because, as property deeds at the time were measured in furlongs, or 660 feet, a change to the Roman measurement would short the farmer or landowner. What do ya think?
Do you know that in the average human body, the skeleton weighs almost 30 pounds! Yet, the soft mass of the adult brain is motionless and it consumes up to 25 percent of the blood's oxygen supply, even though it does not grow, divide, or contract like muscles. So when I am trying to get into shape, I wonder if I should diet from calcium and try not to use my brain so I can breathe when jogging!

Don't forget about those odd phobias! :
Tachophobia = A fear of speed (no problem when I run!)
Zemniphobia = A fear of the great mole rat
Ballistophobia = A fear of missles or bullets

Do you like the pink flamingo?

The pink flamingo is one of those objects that people seem to either love or hate. Considered by some to be a work of art and to others to be visual pollution, this one object stands for everything that is good and bad about our modern society.
Lawn ornaments are nothing new. From marble statues created centuries ago to the Granny Fannies of the late 1980’s, lawn decorations have been around for an eternity. Some compare a lawn without any ornaments to be like a coffee table that is totally empty.
The history of the pink flamingo can be traced back to 1946 when a company called Union Products started manufacturing “Plastics for the Lawn”. Their collection included dogs, ducks, frogs, and even a flamingo. But their products had one problem: They were only two-dimensional.
Hmmm… World peace surely depended on solving this critical problem!
In 1956, the Leominster, Massachusetts company decided to hire a young designer named Don Featherstone. Although Don was a serious sculptor and classical art student, his first project was to redesign their popular duck into the third dimension(One must do what they can to pay the bills). Don used a live duck as his model and after five months of work, the duck was retired to a local park.
His next project would prove to be his most famous. He couldn't get his hands on real flamingos, so he used photographs from a National Geographic in its place. He sculpted the original out of clay, which was then used to make a plaster cast. The plaster cast, in turn, was used to form the molds for the plastic. The original design called for detailed wooden legs, but they proved to be too costly and were replaced by the metal ones still seen today. While the exact date was never recorded, the first pink flamingo was born some time during 1957.
Today, Featherstone is president and part owner of the company that sells an average of 250,000 to 500,000 plastic pink flamingos a year! Should you wish to purchase these decorations, they are readily available. Authentic flamingos always have Don Featherstone’s signature under their tails. Each has a yellow beak with a black tip and they are only sold in pairs.
Useless? Useful? I’ll leave that for you to decide.
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Here are some more odd fears for ya:
Chaetophobia = A fear of hair
Genuphobia = A fear of knees
Scoleciphobia = A fear of worms (sorry Anna!)

How To Find Prime Numbers

I know this probably isn't extremely interesting, or even worth reading about. But I thought is was a good question. It's one mathematicians are still trying to answer. The simplest method was developed by Eratosthenes in the 3rd century B.C. Here's how it works: Suppose we want to find all the prime numbers between 1 and 64. We write out a table of these numbers, 1-6 then start a new row and proceed as follows. The number 2 is the first integer greater than 1, so it is obviously prime. We now cross out all multiples of two. The next number that we haven't crossed out is 3. We circle it and cross out all its multiples. The next non-crossed-out number is 5, so we circle it and cross out all its multiples. We only have to do this for all numbers less than the square root of our upper limit (in this case sqrt(64)=8) since any composite number in the table must have at least one factor less than the square root of the upper limit. What's left after this process of elimination is all the prime numbers between 1 and 64. This is what it should look like!!





Unfortunately, this method is rather time consuming when the numbers you are looking for are much larger. But I thought it was neat. Try not to ban me from the blogging cirlce for this! :)

Here, let me give you something funny. I will in the future, be sharing some definitions of different fears: arachibutyrophobia=peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth!

Suckered??????

Have you ever been tricked by clothing size labels? Of course, everyone has! Not a huge deal, at least to a guy, but I just bought some T-shirts and I normally wear an XL in a particular brand, and when I bought some more shirts they were 10 inches to big...on both sides! To make it worse, they are the same brand as I always wear!
Then I decided to buy some of those athletic super-poly-reinforced-chainmail-teflon-diamondplated-electroplated-hot dipped galvanized-double dry cotton-sports stretch-ferrous superalloy sports shirts, you know the ones that make all your muscles look more impressive than they are. :) Well, I bought two, one short sleeve and one long sleeve. Cool huh? Uh-uh! The short sleeve was way to big and the long sleeve was to small. Exact same brand, and guess what-the exact same size on the tag!
Now we really don't have to go into detail about how guys don't try on clothes before we buy them, it's just understood. I mean, why try them on at the store when you aren't going to wear them until you get home! But there has to be some sort of size regulation or something. If I was a policeman, I think I would give them some kind of ticket!
Anyways, here are some more really cool bizarre facts for you, I know you've been waiting with great anticipiation!

*In Singapore, it is illegal to sell or own chewing gum.
*In the 1985 Boise, Idaho mayoral election, there were four write-in votes for Mr. Potato Head.
*Since the United Nations was founded in 1945, there have been 140 wars.
*The triangular shape that Toblerone chocolates are packaged in, is protected by law.

Supercalifragalistic expialidocious....(I Think!)

Wierd huh?

-Did you know that Jimmy Carter was the first U.S. president to have been born in a hospital?
-Or that Eskimos use refrigerators to keep food FROM freezing?
-The sentence "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog." Uses every letter in the alphabet. (developed by Western Union to test telex/twx communications)
-In every episode of Seinfeld there is a Superman somewhere.
-Average life span of a major league baseball: 7 pitches.
-A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why.
-In the 1940s, the FCC assigned television's Channel 1 to mobile Services(two-way radios in taxicabs, for instance) but did not Pre-number the other channel assignments. That is why your TV set has channels 2 and up, but no channel 1.
-The San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments.
-The only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter is uncopyrightable.
-Hang On Sloopy is the official rock song of Ohio.
-Did you know that there are coffee flavored PEZ?
-The reason firehouses have circular stairways is from the days of yore when the engines were pulled by horses. The horses were stabled on the ground floor and figured out how to walk up straight staircases.
-When opossums are playing 'possum, they are not "playing." They actually pass out from sheer terror.
-The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year because when it was built, engineers failed to take into account the weight of all the books that would occupy the building.
-The highest point in Pennsylvania is lower than the lowest point in Colorado.
-Nutmeg is extremely poisonous if injected intravenously.
-If you have three quarters, four dimes, and four pennies, you have $1.19.You also have the largest amount of money in coins without being able to make change for a dollar.
-The first toilet ever seen on television was on "Leave It to Beaver".
-The only two days of the year in which there are no professional sports games (MLB, NBA, NHL, or NFL) are the day before and the day after the Major League all-star Game.
-Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.
-The name Wendy was made up for the book "Peter Pan."
-In Cleveland, Ohio, it's illegal to catch mice without a hunting license.
-It takes 3,000 cows to supply the NFL with enough leather for a year's supply of footballs.
-There is an average of 178 sesame seeds on a McDonald's Big Mac bun.
-The world's termites outweigh the world's humans 10 to 1.
-Pound for pound, hamburgers cost more than new cars.
-When Heinz ketchup leaves the bottle, it travels at a rate of 25 miles per
year.
-It's possible to lead a cow upstairs...but not downstairs.
-The Bible has been translated into Klingon.
-Humans are the only primates that don't have pigment in the palms of
their hands.
-Ninety percent of New York City cabbies are recently arrived immigrants.
-On average, 100 people choke to death on ballpoint pens every year.
-In 10 minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all the world's
nuclear weapons combined.
-Reno, Nevada is west of Los Angeles, California.
-Elephants can't jump. Every other mammal can.
-The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.
-Five Jell-O flavors that flopped: celery, coffee, cola, apple, and chocolate.
-According to one study, 24% of lawns have some sort of lawn ornament
in their yard.

I just love wierd and useless facts! I hope you found this as cool and interesting as I did!!!! :) :) :) :)

God is Good!

We rejoice in our Great Physician, Jesus Christ! Some wonderful news about Zack. We went to Grand Rapids to do the normal screening, blood/unrine test, and ultrasounds on his kidneys. The doctors had previously wanted him to be tested/tracked every month in Muskegon and he had to go to the Devos Nephrology department in G.R. every 3 months. But after the last visit, he said every test came back completely normal! Blood CRP and ESR levels, blood complements, proteins, and kidney functions all looked perfect. In fact, he said he didn't want to see Zack for 6 months! I trust by faith that this will not interfere anymore in Zack's life. It is a wonderful testimony of Gods' goodness. It goes to show, you can acknowledge a sickness, but we don't have to keep it! We have complete authority over it and we can receive His divine healing. Thank you Lord, thank you. Thanks to all who were praying for Zack-Anna, Colleen, Jeff, and Stephenie. Thank you very much.

A Day Off Work!

Hello everybody! Hi... Hi... Hello... Howdy... and you too-Hi!

I will be off work all day Friday! I am taking Zack to Grand Rapids to continue the monitoring of an ailment that seems to be bothering him. It's called IgA Nephropathy. It's a disease that damages the kidneys because of the blood flow from his arteries. The blood vessels leading into his kidneys constrict more than they should be and when the blood enters these smaller vessels, the pressure and blood flow increases greatly in force and when it hits the kidneys, it forces the small IgA immune complexes in our blood to get deposited and trapped in the walls of the kidney, and eventually scarring the kidney.

Zack seems to be doing just fine and I don't believe, not for one minute, that this will be a problem in his life. One thing I learned from a book about Oral Roberts when I was first saved is that you can't just ignore a sickness and be healed. You can't turn a blind eye to being sick and act like your not ill and it will all go away. That's not how it works. You need to acknowledge that someone or yourself is sick, then you take authority over it, and pray for His divine healing. Foolishly, I've done this myself. I know I'm starting to get sick and I feel it all over my body, but I say "I'm to busy to get sick" or "I don't have time to be sick." But you know what, I still end up sick. When the symptoms are there, you're probably are already sick, you know? You can't fake not being sick. You can't fool a cold! If you have a cold, you have a cold. It's okay to have a cold. But then we pray by faith for His healing and he will deliver! It doesn't take any faith to pretend not to be sick! How can we ask for healing if we pretend it's not there? I thought that was pretty cool.

Anyways, I said all that to ask for your prayers with Zack and to let you know I won't be around to shout back to any of you. I appreciate you all and have a "Sweet" day. I will spending the weekend with my son and I pray that you will have great weekend too, 'cuz I will! Miss ewe.

GALATIONS 2:20
I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.

My Grandfather, the late J. A. ANDERSON

Aug. 25th, 2004
“ A TIME WHEN WE NEED A ROLE MODEL”

IN A TIME WHEN IT’S NOT ALWAYS “POPULAR” TO BE OLD-FASHIONED, OR EVEN TO BE RESPECTFUL OF THE ELDERLY. OUR GRANDFATHER PURPOSED TO SHOW US A THING OR TWO:

· HE WAS SOMEONE WHO WAS VERY PROUD OF WHERE HE CAME FROM. HE ENJOYED BEING SWEDISH AND EVERYONE ELSE KNEW IT. HE KNEW OUR FAVORITE DISH WAS THE COVETED “SWEDISH MEATBALLS”.
· HE WAS SOMEONE WHO WAS VERY PROUD THIS FINE COUNTRY, THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. HE WAS PROUD THAT HE SERVED HIS COUNTRY WITH MILITARY EXPERIENCE, COURAGE, AND VALOR. BUT ALSO IN HIS CONTINUAL SERVICE TO HIS COUNTRY AND FRIENDS AT THE AMERICAN LEGION.
· HE WAS SOMEONE WHO SHOWED US HOW TO TREAT A LADY. HE WAS A FINE GENTLEMAN.
· HE WAS SOMEONE WHO SHOWED US THAT OLDER PEOPLE CAN STILL BE FUNNY AND SOMEWHAT CORNY AT THE SAME TIME. THAT YOU ARE NEVER TO OLD TO HAVE FUN, OR PULL PRACTICAL JOKES-SO BEWARE!
· HE WAS SOMEONE WHO SHOWED US YOUNG PEOPLE WHAT IS MEANS TO WORK FOR A LIVING. HE BUILT HIS HOUSE FROM THE GOUND UP, WITH HIS OWN TWO HANDS.
· MOST IMPORTANTLY, HE WAS SOMEONE WHO WAS PROUD OF HIS OWN FAMILY. NOT ONLY HIS CHILDREN, BUT ALSO HIS GRAND CHILDREN AND GREAT-GRAND CHILD. BECAUSE IN YOUR GRAND AND GREAT-GRAND CHILDREN, YOU CAN DETERMINE HOW GOOD OF PARENTS YOUR OWN CHILDREN HAVE BECOME. IT IS YOUR FINAL DUTY AS A PARENT TO PASS ALL YOUR KNOWLEDGE AND LOVE TO YOUR OWN KIDS. I LOOK AT THE PICTURE OF MY GRANDFATHER HOLDING MY SONS’ HAND, HIS GREAT-GRANDSON, AND MY SON IS STARING UP AT HIM SMILING, AND I CAN’T TELL WHO IS MORE PROUD OF WHOM.

IN A TIME WHEN WE NEED A ROLE MODEL – WE WERE BLESSED ENOUGH TO HAVE ONE, MY GRANDPA.


This was the eulogy I spoke at my grandfather's funeral 2 years ago. He was a great person and a good grandpa. I've always wanted to acquire some of his "old-fashioned" habits and customs. Other than opening up doors for women, you don't see some of the common pratices. In respect to my grandfather and the "fairer sex", let's see what is out there for us men:

Etiquette with a lady
* If it starts to rain, take off your coat and hold it over a lady's head while you make a break for the nearest shelter.
* Hold doors open for women and let walk ahead of you.
* Give a lady your seat on a crowded bus, subway, or luncheon.
* To keep her from getting muddied by passing cars, always walk on the outside of the sidewalk.
* Try to present a gift of some sort to your lady when going out on a date, preferably not a power drill.
* Stand up when a lady leaves the table and again when she returns.
* A gentleman removes his hat when entering a room where there are ladies. When he meets a lady friend, he should raise his hat gracefully.
* It is not deemed polite and respectful to smoke in the presence of ladies, even though they are amiable enough to permit it.

Here are some examples of fine table etiquette:
* Do not play with the table utensils or crumble the bread.
* Do not put your elbows on the table, or sit too far back, or lounge.
* Do not talk loud or boisterously.
* Be cheerful in conduct or conversation.
* Never, if possible, cough or sneeze at the table.
* Never tilt back your chair while at the table, or at any other time.
* Do not talk when the mouth is full.
* Never make a noise while eating.
* Do not open the mouth while chewing, but keep the lips closed. It is not necessary to show people how you masticate your food.
* Never indicate that you notice anything unpleasant in the food.
* Do not break your bread into the soup, nor mix with gravy. It is bad taste to mix food on the plate.
* Never leave the table before the rest of the family or guests, without asking the host or hostess to excuse you.
* Eat soup with the side of the spoon, without noise.
* The fork is used to convey the food to the mouth, except when a spoon is necessary for liquids.
* Raw oysters are eaten with a fork.
* If you wish to be served with more tea or coffee, place your spoon in your saucer.
* Tea or coffee should never be poured into the saucer to cool, but sipped from the cup.
* If a dish is presented to you, serve yourself first and then pass it on.
* Never allow butter, soup or other food to remain on your whiskers.
* Never wear gloves at the table, unless your hands are for some special reason unfit to be seen.
* Never, when serving others, overload the plate nor force upon them delicacies which they decline. * Never make a great display when removing hair, insects or other disagreeable things from your food. Place them quietly under the edge of your plate.
* Eat cheese with a fork, not a knife.
* Ask a servant in a low tone for what you want.
* Break your bread, do not cut it.
* Eat fruit with silver knives and forks.
* If you prefer, take up asparagus with the fingers. Olives and artichokes are always so eaten.
* If a course is set before you that you do not wish, do not touch it.
* It is not your business to reprove the waiter for improper conduct; that belongs to your host.
* A gentleman must help a lady whom he has escorted to the table, to all she wishes; but it is improper for him to offer to help other ladies who have escorts.
* Use a napkin only for your mouth. Never use it for your nose, face or forehead.
* It is very rude to pick your teeth at the table. If it becomes necessary to do so, hold your napkin over your mouth. - "How To Mow The Lawn" by Sam Martin, 2005

There you have it. I have a lot of work to do! They are not life or death, but I think all men could stretch themselves in the lost art of being a man. Learn how to truly treat a lady, and help her get to know the hero in you.

"The true gentleman is one who has been fashioned after the highest models...his qualities depend not on fashion or manners but upon moral worth--not on personal possessions but upon personal qualities" - "Happy Homes and the Hearts that Make Them", 1882

PROVERB 31:10
Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

PROVERS 20:7
The just man walketh in his integrity: his children are blessed after him.