I LOVE PUNS!!!

I think puns are sooo much fun. They are really cool how they play on words. And now, a brief word from our sponsors:"
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A pun (also known as paronomasia) is a figure of speech which consists of a deliberate confusion of similar words or phrases for rhetorical effect, whether humorous or serious. A pun can rely on the assumed equivalency of multiple similar words (homonymy), of different shades of meaning of one word (polysemy), or of a literal meaning with a metaphor. Bad puns are sometimes called "cheesy".
Walter Redfern (in Puns, Blackwell, London, 1984) succinctly said: "To pun is to treat homonyms as synonyms".
In order to be able to pun effectively it is necessary that a language must include homonyms which may readily be misrepresented as synonyms. Languages with complex gender or case structures tend not to facilitate this, although puns can be constructed in all languages with varying degrees of difficulty; i.e. puns are said to be easy to construct in languages such as Chinese or English, but rarer in Russian. The word pun itself is thought to be originally a contraction of the (now archaic) pundigrion. This latter term is thought to have originated from punctilious, which itself derived from the Italian puntiglio (originally meaning "a fine point"), diminutive of punto, "point", from the Latin punctus, past participle of pungere, "to prick." These etymological sources are reported in the Oxford English Dictionary, which nonetheless labels them "conjecture".
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Okay, like I was saying, puns can be fun for everyone at any age. Here are some of my favorites:
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MY WORK CAREER
My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned...couldn't concentrate. After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it...mainly because it was a so-so job. Then I tried to be a chef -- figured it would add a little spice to my life, but I just didn't have the thyme. I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the ax. After that I worked in a blanket factory, but it folded. Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried but I just didn't fit in. After many years of trying to find steady work I finally got a job as a historian until I realized there was no future in it. My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy. I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income. My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.
SO I THINK I'LL RETIRE, BECAUSE I THINK I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB!
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A MAHARAJAH OF INDIA
The maharajah of an Indian Province issued a royal decree. He ordered that no one was to kill any wild animals while he was the country's leader. The decree was honored until there were so many Bengal Tigers running loose that the people revolted and threw the maharajah from power. This is the first known instance of the reign being called on account of the game.
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A pessimist's blood type is always b-negative.
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Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
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Well, you know what they say, a good pun is it's own RE-WORD! Ha, ha, ha! ;) :) :)